We ate and skyped Jamie. Later Ira and Ashley arrived at Jamie's place with Evie and we skyped with them as well. They are on the way to S.C. for a week on the waterfront with family. I hope it is pleasant. Beck was riding with Gramma Honey. I miss family so much and even though I am making the best of being snowbound and kept close by financial concerns it is still my heart's desire to be with my children and enjoy them at holiday time. Jessi, Jamie and Lance, Ira and Ash plus the two babies and then Mike, Jessica and Eliana. Sigh but now that I have said it again I will go forward bravely and with joy. My life connection lesson for Sunday is on Courage. I need to keep on keeping on. Bless you all.
Friday, December 26, 2008
Boxing Day at Mom and John's
We managed to get here when the turkey was done and the meal nearly on the table. Yeah! S had to go pick up kids and I gave Tisha a bath and got the house cleaned up and Jack ready to go while she was gone. So the freezing rain did not keep us from coming but ... Jenna did text and tell me there is ice in Reedsburg and a possibility of a flash flood tomorrow. Weather keeps us hemmed in on all sides. So I will try to go home in the morning. I have much to do and later tomorrow it seems we are to get 3" of snow. I want to make it back down to spend time with Mike, Jessica and Eliana and have a proper celebration with food and gifts. I love this big computer that mom got because of Macular Degeneration. Mom has trouble now seeing faces and can still read but only with large print books and then a magnifier and good light. What a trial!
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Being strong and mature
God's aim for us as Christians is that we be unified, that we operate in the Kingdom of God now not just waiting for eternity in Heaven, and that we spread the gospel using all means ....sometimes using words (ha!)
Well this is some hat trick if we haven't let the word of God change us and mature us. Every slight or supposed slight becomes a looming threat if we operate in our own strength. The hardest slights are from family and those closest from us and those are the very ones that need the most grace. Those in the body of Christ end up being targets for criticism. We bulk up and posture to look good and we have high expectations of one another for our favorite characteristics and forms of integrity. We sometimes ignore out own flaws when we are concentrated on whatever we perceive to be another's lack. That scripture about ignoring the beam in our own eye while we tell our brother (sister) to remove the splinter...well I find this true for me and for those around me as well. We lick our wounds until they are raw.
I find that blogging my thoughts on a subject is an effective way for me to bring my random thoughts into order and see what is wrong with the deal. Often what is wrong is my own attitude. I recently blogged about the house growing smaller with 3 adults living in 3 rooms with a large dog and a lot of stuff. This is indeed a subject on my mind daily when I am there and sometimes when I am away as I know that is where I live. My blog set the situation up for viewing...not so much by my beloved fans (all 3) but for myself. As I write I see things about me and the putting it up there to see helps me make sense of my feelings as I organize and ponder the situations that come up. I do not apologise for using this blog system for my own growth. Instead I applaud my right to continue to be a self-reflecting person. I am intensely busy and often side-tracked with needs of others or pressing things to accomplish to keep the ship afloat so to speak. I take extra days to help others or earn a dollar or to just spent the money effectively so as to continue life, liberty and happiness for the ones I am responsible for at present. It is a weight but with God's help and this blog I may make it through without any major breakdowns or gliches. Those of you out in blogland please do not take my ponderings personally or decide major moves by what I write. Give me grace and allow the humor of the human comedy to filter through and bring you a chuckle now and again. Our dilemmas are similar. There is nothing new under the sun but oh my it can be an aha moment when you become aware of a lesson or a new level of maturity.
Well this is some hat trick if we haven't let the word of God change us and mature us. Every slight or supposed slight becomes a looming threat if we operate in our own strength. The hardest slights are from family and those closest from us and those are the very ones that need the most grace. Those in the body of Christ end up being targets for criticism. We bulk up and posture to look good and we have high expectations of one another for our favorite characteristics and forms of integrity. We sometimes ignore out own flaws when we are concentrated on whatever we perceive to be another's lack. That scripture about ignoring the beam in our own eye while we tell our brother (sister) to remove the splinter...well I find this true for me and for those around me as well. We lick our wounds until they are raw.
I find that blogging my thoughts on a subject is an effective way for me to bring my random thoughts into order and see what is wrong with the deal. Often what is wrong is my own attitude. I recently blogged about the house growing smaller with 3 adults living in 3 rooms with a large dog and a lot of stuff. This is indeed a subject on my mind daily when I am there and sometimes when I am away as I know that is where I live. My blog set the situation up for viewing...not so much by my beloved fans (all 3) but for myself. As I write I see things about me and the putting it up there to see helps me make sense of my feelings as I organize and ponder the situations that come up. I do not apologise for using this blog system for my own growth. Instead I applaud my right to continue to be a self-reflecting person. I am intensely busy and often side-tracked with needs of others or pressing things to accomplish to keep the ship afloat so to speak. I take extra days to help others or earn a dollar or to just spent the money effectively so as to continue life, liberty and happiness for the ones I am responsible for at present. It is a weight but with God's help and this blog I may make it through without any major breakdowns or gliches. Those of you out in blogland please do not take my ponderings personally or decide major moves by what I write. Give me grace and allow the humor of the human comedy to filter through and bring you a chuckle now and again. Our dilemmas are similar. There is nothing new under the sun but oh my it can be an aha moment when you become aware of a lesson or a new level of maturity.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Romance is in the air!
Jenna has a new man in her life and he is super cute and smart. I look forward to his flying in and getting to meet him. I will be pleased if he is all he seems. I want good things for her. Maybe somthing good can come from an internet Christian dating service. Only time will tell.
Life has many twists and turns but oh what an adventure. I remember love at it's beginnings. No small thing that tangled web of emotions. I know more now but that alone does not decrease the intensity of emotions I remember well. Those feelings are private now as I adjust to the stage I am presently in. No less love just new emotions...
Love can never be clinical. It is too good and lovely to be without feeling. God is love. Oh how wonderful that is and how loved I am. I have the word of God telling me how precious I am. That with a trunk full of love filled cards and letters from my husband and kids and some dear friends make my life full and fuller. I do not fear my rocking chair with memories like those.
Jenna I hope that you make some good ones and find a man who will hold your heart dearly.
Jack tells me every day that he loves me and worries for my safety. I am indeed blessed!
Life has many twists and turns but oh what an adventure. I remember love at it's beginnings. No small thing that tangled web of emotions. I know more now but that alone does not decrease the intensity of emotions I remember well. Those feelings are private now as I adjust to the stage I am presently in. No less love just new emotions...
Love can never be clinical. It is too good and lovely to be without feeling. God is love. Oh how wonderful that is and how loved I am. I have the word of God telling me how precious I am. That with a trunk full of love filled cards and letters from my husband and kids and some dear friends make my life full and fuller. I do not fear my rocking chair with memories like those.
Jenna I hope that you make some good ones and find a man who will hold your heart dearly.
Jack tells me every day that he loves me and worries for my safety. I am indeed blessed!
Friday, December 19, 2008
Another Winter Storm Watch for our area...
We have gotton 15 inches this week so far and tomorrow is predicted to bring more and right on the heels of more snow the wind is to pick up and the temperatures to drop so wind-chill could be -25. Wow! I brought my silk long-underwear bottoms with me this weekend and I am glad. Last winter was bad but this one seems to have a possibility of putting last year to shame. Come on I do like a bit of snow but oh my not this incessant cold and snow. Shoveling is in my and Jenna's future I am sure.
Christmas is next week and I am eyeing the projected weather in our area. It affects the dogs and the people at my house. I hope Hobbz will willingly come in and stay in the laundry room at night. He likes to be outside but it is just too cold when it gets below zero. Hobbz is 15 and has seen his share of winters but his shelter is only a plastic dog house now, not a porch as was in La Valle.
I usually look forward to being snowed in once or twice a winter. I always have projects to do and a couple movies I could watch or a good book to read. My tiny house and the sharing of it has dampened my joy at having a snow day. Jenna is a student and she is chronically ill. I could go on and on about the drawbacks of living in a tiny house with those other than in your immediate family but I choose to look at the things which are positive that are coming out of this strange invasive situation. Jack has limited entertainment. A few library books, tv and his cell/housemates to amuse him with only occasional outings and visitors.
Jack gets care on the weekends and I get a change of responsibility coming to be with the kids plus opportunity to earn a bit to help us. That is the main gain for me. Perhaps if I did not have someone living with us we could live on less money and I would not need so much extra but that is not proven only "guestimated". I would have more space.
The benefits are also somewhat favorable for Jenna. She is getting hands on coaching and mentoring plus she is being encouraged to choose positive things for her health and her future. She would not be able to go to school without a situation that allowed her to live without having to pay her own rent/utilities/food/some transportation and other things needed for quality life. Her contribution does not offset the amount that would be needed to provide for her needs so this makes it a "benny" for her in that way. Living in a small area and having to consolidate and lose privacy is indeed a cost but setting any goal and working toward it is always at a cost.
I think about our situation and when drama/tension is high I wonder if it is the best choice at the end of Jack's life and at a time when I have so much stress and responsibility but I am prayerfully trying to listen and go forward to do the right and best thing.
God sometimes asks us to go out of our comfort zone for a time. One benefit of me cooperating in this is growth in my patience level but seems like every front has that opportunity (from Jack and his medical conditions and on to working with Tisha and various kids in their various states.) I am open to being stretched and changed. I am certain Jenna is too. She has her own list of irritations I am certain. Door slamming and pan clanging are some of my favorite normal activities. I love to have lights on and I talk to myself on many occasions. I have a strange sense of humor as well and can be quite candid when the occasion arises for me to air my thoughts.
This winter may be hard as our situation is like living in a log-cabin in the wilderness. The elements and the bears are outside and the smells, sounds, personalities, foibles and tempers are on the inside! Hoopla!
Bring on the snow and cold. Let's make this a winter to remember, huh? Love and Life are messy!
Christmas is next week and I am eyeing the projected weather in our area. It affects the dogs and the people at my house. I hope Hobbz will willingly come in and stay in the laundry room at night. He likes to be outside but it is just too cold when it gets below zero. Hobbz is 15 and has seen his share of winters but his shelter is only a plastic dog house now, not a porch as was in La Valle.
I usually look forward to being snowed in once or twice a winter. I always have projects to do and a couple movies I could watch or a good book to read. My tiny house and the sharing of it has dampened my joy at having a snow day. Jenna is a student and she is chronically ill. I could go on and on about the drawbacks of living in a tiny house with those other than in your immediate family but I choose to look at the things which are positive that are coming out of this strange invasive situation. Jack has limited entertainment. A few library books, tv and his cell/housemates to amuse him with only occasional outings and visitors.
Jack gets care on the weekends and I get a change of responsibility coming to be with the kids plus opportunity to earn a bit to help us. That is the main gain for me. Perhaps if I did not have someone living with us we could live on less money and I would not need so much extra but that is not proven only "guestimated". I would have more space.
The benefits are also somewhat favorable for Jenna. She is getting hands on coaching and mentoring plus she is being encouraged to choose positive things for her health and her future. She would not be able to go to school without a situation that allowed her to live without having to pay her own rent/utilities/food/some transportation and other things needed for quality life. Her contribution does not offset the amount that would be needed to provide for her needs so this makes it a "benny" for her in that way. Living in a small area and having to consolidate and lose privacy is indeed a cost but setting any goal and working toward it is always at a cost.
I think about our situation and when drama/tension is high I wonder if it is the best choice at the end of Jack's life and at a time when I have so much stress and responsibility but I am prayerfully trying to listen and go forward to do the right and best thing.
God sometimes asks us to go out of our comfort zone for a time. One benefit of me cooperating in this is growth in my patience level but seems like every front has that opportunity (from Jack and his medical conditions and on to working with Tisha and various kids in their various states.) I am open to being stretched and changed. I am certain Jenna is too. She has her own list of irritations I am certain. Door slamming and pan clanging are some of my favorite normal activities. I love to have lights on and I talk to myself on many occasions. I have a strange sense of humor as well and can be quite candid when the occasion arises for me to air my thoughts.
This winter may be hard as our situation is like living in a log-cabin in the wilderness. The elements and the bears are outside and the smells, sounds, personalities, foibles and tempers are on the inside! Hoopla!
Bring on the snow and cold. Let's make this a winter to remember, huh? Love and Life are messy!
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Oooocheeewawa!
The kids are wild tonight. Lewcie is here while her sister and Melissa go to a "Go Fish" concert. Demetrius and Lewcie built a fort out of pillows and blankets and a minute ago he busted his lip doing somersaults so now he has a fat bloody lip and wants ice-cream to soothe it. Heck I do not care these kids get a suger dose every few hours so it can't hurt.
Paula Dean is on and has Christmas cookies on with people coming on to volunteer their best recipes. Edward is in bed. Tisha is bathed and down for the night. Karah took a shower looking forward to church in the morning and I am fixin' to shorten their chains and put some down to bed if the rowdy stuff doesn't go down a level or two. The dog is barking and the giggle level just increased with the ice cream. Sigh. Kids having way too much fun is either a kick or a pain. Depends on who and what day huh?
Eliana was here today and it went very well. She cooperated and played well, took a tiny nap and ate as well as she ever does. She did lick her lips a lot and is chapped but oh my if that is the worst of it we are doing good. She was so good with the baby! She will make a good sister/helper.
I just lined up all Tisha's shoes and my oh my has she got a fine line-up. Most are high tops as those are the only ones that stay on. She is used to shoes now and likes them. Who was the shoe lady? Well for a 5 year old she is doing well in the shoe dept. Of course there is little that she needs or wants so if a few extra colors of shoes makes her dressed up and smiling then I am all for the excess!
Paula Dean is on and has Christmas cookies on with people coming on to volunteer their best recipes. Edward is in bed. Tisha is bathed and down for the night. Karah took a shower looking forward to church in the morning and I am fixin' to shorten their chains and put some down to bed if the rowdy stuff doesn't go down a level or two. The dog is barking and the giggle level just increased with the ice cream. Sigh. Kids having way too much fun is either a kick or a pain. Depends on who and what day huh?
Eliana was here today and it went very well. She cooperated and played well, took a tiny nap and ate as well as she ever does. She did lick her lips a lot and is chapped but oh my if that is the worst of it we are doing good. She was so good with the baby! She will make a good sister/helper.
I just lined up all Tisha's shoes and my oh my has she got a fine line-up. Most are high tops as those are the only ones that stay on. She is used to shoes now and likes them. Who was the shoe lady? Well for a 5 year old she is doing well in the shoe dept. Of course there is little that she needs or wants so if a few extra colors of shoes makes her dressed up and smiling then I am all for the excess!
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